I think it's time now to introduce you to my Croatian conscience.

Danijel - my Croatian conscience

Yes, you read that correctly...my conscience is Croatian.  

This may be somewhat confusing to those who know me...as my parents are of Irish and Scottish descent.  But, it'll make sense when I tell you that the reason my conscience is Croatian is because Croatians are mean.  To clarify, and to avoid people thinking that I like to stereotype, my gay boyfriend Danijel is Croatian...and so was this "big boned" guy from Zagreb whom I met at the University Residence when I was living in Malta.  In 1996, the guy in Malta nicknamed me "debela" and Danijel's been calling me the same since 2003.

Debela = Fat..in feminine form..i.e. me.

It used to hurt my feelings...now I think it's hilarious...and that I should probably get off the couch and do something.

Danijel also leaves motivational text messages frequently, such as this...

"Don't sit on vicker chair, you too fet."     

Okay, point taken.  They tease because they love or at least that's what I'm going to believe...and it's kinda what I'm thinking in the back of my mind when I make unhealthy choices...so there you go...my Croatian conscience.